I'm imagining The Donald delivering the first sentence of the Gettysburg Address, in the afternoon of November 19th, 1863...
"Thank you! Thank you! Four score and seven years ago, and I mean - that was like a really, really long time ago, folks - before that Crooked Lying Stephen Douglas was even born - he's dead now and I shouldn't speak ill of the dead!
But before that Crooked Lying Stephen Douglas was even born, our fathers, and don't forget our hot, hot fore-mothers - always remember the ladies, too! Hey! Like my daughter! Is she hot? Yes she is! Yes she is! She is so hot! So hot! So hot!
So, back to our forefathers and those hot, hot fore-mothers - They brought forth on this continent, a new nation - And what a beautiful new nation it was too! Yes! Yes! USA! USA! USA!
Anyway - Conceived in Liberty! Uh Oh! A protester! Get em out! Get em out! Get out! Out! Out! Sorry folks! They show up and think they have a right. I'll show them some rights, and some lefts too!
Anyway... Anyway, folks -A new nation dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.
Except for that Crooked Lying Stephen Douglas! Lock Him Up! Lock Him Up! Lock Him Up! I know - he's dead, but Lock Him Up anyway!"
